Monday, 29 September 2014

my psychopath journal



I made a huge mistake and left my iPod at the tattoo shop. It's extremely out of my way to get back there to pick it up, and I don't work there again until Thursday afternoon. You guys. What the fuck. I'm going to have to hear the bus people for three days.

At least I have a stack of library books that are due back in a week to keep my mind occupied.

At the top there is a photo I took of my journal. I LOVE writing in journals like this, so it's all small and compact and neat. It gives me the same satisfaction as when I'm going on a trip and can fit everything I need into one tidy backpack. You know? Anyone else love packing for a trip and knowing all you need is in one single bag?

I actually fantasize quite often about packing art supplies up for the next time I go on a trip.

Weird.

Life is pulling me in all sorts of directions. On one hand it's sort of exciting to feel so needed and to be working and doing things, and on the other hand I am starting to feel like I'm not quite human/that I have lost the creative me I've been cultivating over the past few years.

On top of that I've been REALLY wanting to take a university class, either in creative writing or a language. Probably German because I strangely know a lot of Germans all of a sudden, but I'd also love to learn Japanese. Or sign language. I probably won't, because who needs yet another commitment right now, what with having three jobs all of a sudden, but I've been wishing I could be bettering myself somehow.

I know there are online things I can do but I'm not the kind of self-motivated language learner...I need an instructor and classmates or I'll never truly try.

Another thing I fantasize about is applying for grad school, for creative writing.

And now I have to go get dressed for a day of textbook ordering and being a cashier and like, folding college sweatshirts and filling up Coca-Cola displays or whatever.

I think today I will find out whether I get to keep the title of assistant course materials buyer, or somebody with more seniority in the college decided to snake it from me. Not that I'm bitter about how that keeps happening or anything...

Wish me luck. Because I could really use a steady position this winter.




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